Amen to losing our coping mechanisms. I got to see Marshall Rosenberg speak when he was alive and my head spun when said "Mistakes don't exist. All that exists are more or less successful strategies to get our needs met." Alcohol and drugs feel great (hence they are so hard to quit) they are just a less successful (or deadly) coping mechanism.
Great piece - I'll have 22 years in May and agree that it's structural - create a life without support for sobriety you will struggle. If you create the conditions necessary you will thrive ("sobriety in all it's forms"). I recently got my MSW as a 57 year old white dude steeped in abstinence and was shocked at the new definitions of sobriety and harm reduction. Personally they don't work for me but they help some. Out here in the Pac Northwest Wellbriety is gaining traction. Thank you for posting.
Congrats on the upcoming anniversary and for the MSW. I celebrated 28 in September, and have worked in the for all but a couple years. Definitely, a lot has changed.
Not sure if you know who Father Martin was, but he was a legend in the industry. I believe what he said about all this: “AA is what works best for most people.” But, these days there are so many other options, and people have a right to try whatever path they think will work for them.
Often, I know clients would benefit from meetings, but they’re not willing to go and I won’t die on that hill when I’m working with them.
I put it this way. I don’t care how you get sober. I care that you get sober.
i definitely went through a few years of white-knuckling it, just trying to stay sober without really changing anything, which eventually led to relapse. but now, recovery feels like the easiest choice for living a happy life, and i’m so grateful for that. thank you for sharing!
Amen to losing our coping mechanisms. I got to see Marshall Rosenberg speak when he was alive and my head spun when said "Mistakes don't exist. All that exists are more or less successful strategies to get our needs met." Alcohol and drugs feel great (hence they are so hard to quit) they are just a less successful (or deadly) coping mechanism.
I have bottomless respect for anyone who has gotten sober. In a world that doesn't lack challenges few things impress me more.
Love this piece=So dead on Tom ~ many thanks!
Great piece - I'll have 22 years in May and agree that it's structural - create a life without support for sobriety you will struggle. If you create the conditions necessary you will thrive ("sobriety in all it's forms"). I recently got my MSW as a 57 year old white dude steeped in abstinence and was shocked at the new definitions of sobriety and harm reduction. Personally they don't work for me but they help some. Out here in the Pac Northwest Wellbriety is gaining traction. Thank you for posting.
Congrats on the upcoming anniversary and for the MSW. I celebrated 28 in September, and have worked in the for all but a couple years. Definitely, a lot has changed.
Not sure if you know who Father Martin was, but he was a legend in the industry. I believe what he said about all this: “AA is what works best for most people.” But, these days there are so many other options, and people have a right to try whatever path they think will work for them.
Often, I know clients would benefit from meetings, but they’re not willing to go and I won’t die on that hill when I’m working with them.
I put it this way. I don’t care how you get sober. I care that you get sober.
i definitely went through a few years of white-knuckling it, just trying to stay sober without really changing anything, which eventually led to relapse. but now, recovery feels like the easiest choice for living a happy life, and i’m so grateful for that. thank you for sharing!
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